Dear Me – circa Jan 2012,
I wasn’t sure whether I should write this letter to you. You see, this year is going to be difficult. And inconclusive. Your future self (aka Me – circa Jan 2013) has no easy answers for you. Actually I have no answers at all.
But I decided to follow tradition and write to you anyway because despite the trials 2012 is going to bring you it will also bring you amazing gifts.
You will travel to Venice, Paris, Barcelona, Lisbon, Brussels, Scotland, Rome, and Turkey. The Girl and you will savour every one of these holidays.
You will visit Mama and Papa (by yourself) for one of the nicest trips back ‘home’ in a long time. They will shower you with love and affection and will actually acknowledge the fact that The Girl is part of your life. You’ll reconnect with friends who you’d stopped talking to because you didn’t have the strength to come out to them earlier. They will overwhelm you with how much they care for you & how little they care about your sexuality. You will also meet new friends and once again be surprised that people actually want to spend time with you! For the first time in nearly 6 years, you’ll feel ‘homesick’ after you come back from India and realize you’re homesick, not for India, but something else that you can’t quite put your finger on.
Work will be satisfying and fulfilling. You’ll continue to love your job and feel immense gratitude that the Universe led you here.
You’ll turn vegan (yes, really) and you’ll be shocked at the amount of willpower you have. Not even a bowl of lamb biryani, right under your nose, will shake it. You’ll be tempted – but you’ll stay strong. And, I know this’ll make you happy, you will lose those annoying 4 kilos you have been trying to lose for so very long.
You’ll watch 3 events at the Olympics! You’ll make some new friends and spend many wonderful weekends with your current ones too.
But… (Why did there have to be a ‘but’ in a year that has been so generous in so many other ways?)… The Girl will fall ill. She is still ill. It gets worse before it gets slightly better so don’t be too alarmed when she needs crutches to walk. The diagnosis will take forever and will be incorrect and frustrating. You won’t find a good doctor or diagnosis in 2012. But you will find both as soon as the year ends. I want to tell you that the prognosis is fairly encouraging. That she will start to get better, but that ‘better’ will be a relative term.
Stay strong and keep your spirits high. This year is going to take a lot away but will also leave you with a lot of gifts.
Me – circa Jan 2013