Expecto Patronum

The Dementors are gone.

My Patronus is a Pear Orchard in a sleepy village in Portugal. Details on that some other time.

I took some time off work to attend a week long Drawing Course. It was amazing. I couldn’t even draw stick figures on the first day. By the last day I had drawn an amazing self portrait & a few other drawings that I never in my wildest dreams I imagined I’d be able to draw. Here’s the portrait I drew of my course-mate on Day 4 (She thought it was pretty spot on!):

Image

More than anything, the class taught me that drawing is a very meditative process. I have tried and failed several times to practise Mindfulness Meditation. Drawing made me go to that place of calm and meditation without even trying. So now I try to draw everyday. In reality, I draw about 3-4 times a week. 

I also went to see a coach who helped me sort out a lot of stuff that was causing me turmoil. She’s not a therapist (even though she does have a Psychology degree) but she’s better than any therapist I’ve seen.

I had a chat with my boss & asked him if I could do something different & told him what I had in mind & if that was ok with him. His words to me were: “You’ve earned the right to do whatever you want in this company.” I love him. So, I am teaching myself a bunch of new stuff with online videos and by getting my more experienced (& generous) colleagues to let me shadow them and so work is back to being fulfilling again.

We are finally moving into the shiny new flat that we bought last year. (We bought off plan.)

TG’s health is getting so much better. *Touch Wood*

We had a short & sweet visit to India in April. My parents have come SUCH A LONG WAY with me & The Girl. They were wonderful with her. While they still don’t talk about us to their friends their acceptance right now is more than I ever hoped for. We also met up with a few friends & TG & I attended a Gaysi event which was pretty special too. I was also pleasantly surprised & touched at how one particular friend went out of her way to meet TG & me & to spend time with us. Thanks for the Himalaya Kulfi and all your other thoughtful gestures, SD.

There’s more travel in the horizon – Austin & Dallas in August – to meet some of TG’s family & my childhood friend who now has an adorable baby. Another trip to Portugal. And then back to India in December.

Life is full and fulfilling.

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15 thoughts on “Expecto Patronum

  1. raconteur says:

    I was introduced to your blog over a year ago by a friend and I’ve been quietly following it since. Finally, I have mustered the courage to write a comment. Just want you to know your blog has helped me tremendously over the last year. The struggles, the successes and most importantly the love you and TG share. It’s beautiful. Really. Thank you very much for sharing! It means more than you think. Please keep sharing. Enjoy more drawing! (that rhymed :))
    Speaking of portraits and London – The National Portrait Museum is showcasing a Virginia Woolf exhibit starting July. Im a big fan and plan to come see it! In case anyone here is interested.

    • Broom says:

      I should show you my “before” drawings. Trust me – I’m a complete beginner! :)
      Thanks, though.
      Will tell you where I’m moving, offline.

  2. Your post couldnt have come at a better time. I loved this post. This is just the push I needed to get my creativity on. I have been pondering a lot about what I need to do other than WORK and feel alive at the end of the day. I was also contemplating having a chat with my boss about the same issues.

    I feel as if I am ready to do something else with my life. If he doesn’t give me that chance or option, I will simply leave. Mr. Husband says he has got my back, if I want to do anything else in life and also if I wanted to quit. Last year Mr. Husband had got me 2 charcoal pencils and canvas papers, because he knows I love to sketch and draw. And they are just lying in the corner of my room gathering dust. I think atleast picking them up and drawing random lines may get the ball rolling.

    I need to have the calmness and fluidity in mind to feel and get better.

    Did I say I loved this post? :)

    And thanks for your post.

  3. shyameds says:

    Wow, that is a near-perfect portrait! Your instructor must have been top class – and that is not taking anything away from your own talent, Broom! :)

  4. Aastha says:

    In the midst of misery, I’ve been devouring your blog with the eagerness of a starving homeless person.

    I opted into a “love” marriage. It’s been under a year, and the honeymoon period was surprisingly short (does under a day count?).

    When I read about your love, I cry. And today, you inspired me to buy myself flowers.

    Many people probably write to you about being gay. But love is love right? And straight or gay, we all deserve some. I am yours, in tears. And I hope, that I can be good enough, make good things happen to me.

    It’s a hard journey, from what I gather from your writing. Please know, that what I feel for you isn’t envy. Its so much wonderment. And so.much.hope.
    Thank you.

    • Broom says:

      Yes, love is love. And I hope that you find yours.

      I’m sorry you’re going through what you’re going through. It IS hard, but there is happiness waiting on the other side.

      xo

  5. La vida loca says:

    Hi Broom! This is such a happy post. Good for you. Love the drawing. I started drawing as well as a way to deal with dementors of my own. This is not about me. It’s about you and I am happy for you. XO

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